Mother's Day

I have done a lot of things in my life that I am proud of. I was the first one in my family to graduate from college. I worked for many years helping at-risk youth stay in school. Now I work for a non-profit case managing college students to eliminate barriers they may have that may cause them to drop out of college. I bought a house. I am a pretty great wife to my husband. I've been a great friend, an awesome sister, and a good daughter. But most of all, I am proud to be a Mother. I know that not all women want to be a Mother, but I am glad that I am one. I love watching my daughter grow on a daily basis. I love listening to her stories, her excitement, her innocence. She is so smart, funny, charming, and sassy. I love watching her act like me. She is so full of personality. I love seeing her sleepy face first thing in the morning and asking, "Where's my Daddy?" I tell her he's at work and she says, "Lemme check" and walks through the house just to make sure he's not hiding from her. I enjoy listening to her sing and combine multiple songs into one tune. I love everything about her, but what I love most is that she is mine.
One of my favorite days of my life will always be the day I became a Mother. Becoming a Mom is hard, stressful work. A woman carries her baby for (hopefully) 9 months. In that time, you feel sickness, exhaustion, heart burn, strange movements, baby kicks. You watch your belly grow and wonder if you're gaining too much or too little weight. You worry that you aren't doing everything "right". Foods to avoid, managing a healthy diet, drinking enough water, remembering to take vitamins, and exercising. What if he/she comes early? Do I have everything I need for the baby? What if something is wrong? What if I am not a good mother? A lot goes through the mind of an expectant mother. Then there's labor. That's tough enough on its own. To get pain medication or not, what if I need a c-section, what if I deliver on the side of the highway? My labor and delivery was tough. I'll spare you the details, but my husband thought he was going to be a single dad. Thankfully, he's not.

Then once the baby is here, bring on the Mommy Wars. Breastfeeding vs formula feeding, co-sleeping vs crib, disposable diapers vs cloth diapers, the list goes on and on. Are the decisions I am making best for my child? I am lucky to be part of a very supportive Mommy group, but even within our group, there are many different opinions, viewpoints, and parenting styles. Being a parent is tough. You have to stand up for what you believe is right for your child and family.

Brynlee just fits perfectly into our lives. It honestly feels like she was made to be my child, if that makes sense. I can't imagine her being any different. She's mine. I hope one day, when she becomes a Mom, she will understand my deep love for her.

I cannot believe she is almost 3. When I call her "baby", she always tells me she's not a baby. She's a big girl. She's almost 3. I get it, sweet child. I do. But you'll always be my baby.

Best,